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Posts Tagged ‘true love’

Twenty-two years ago today, I shared vows of marriage with Captain Cavedweller.

These vows – these promises to love, honor, obey and cherish him – weren’t ones I took lightly.

In a time when it seems many people view marriage as something disposable, we made a commitment to each other we intend to honor until and with our last breath.

Lately, my thoughts have danced around what it means to me to be a wife. So here goes:

  • It means listening with an open mind.
  • It means loving unconditionally.
  • It means being willing to make sacrifices for CC – including letting him have the last gingerbread bar.
  • It means swallowing down snarky comments before they work their way from my brain out my lips because they come from a bad day or a grumpy attitude.
  • It means living in a home full of peace since both of us despise conflict.
  • It means having someone I trust completely, who can trust me, too.
  • It means laughing all the time because CC is funny and a big tease – and has a hard time being serious. And I’m okay with that.
  • It means having a big, warm, callused hand to hold mine.
  • It means a pair of broad shoulders do their best to shelter me from life’s storms and provide a place for me to rest my weary head or shed tears.
  • It means being a partner in so many aspects – from business decisions to having an accomplice in silly shenanigans.
  • It means going through each day knowing wherever CC is at- that’s where you’ll find my heart.

Life gets busy and hectic and crazy, especially this time of year. It makes me think of all the different things I am. I am a:

Daughter

Sister

Aunt

Niece

Cousin

Friend

Dreamer

Blogger

Writer

but one of the things that means the most to me is this: I am a wife.

Captain Cavedweller’s wife.

Some of my friends say I won the husband lottery with Captain Cavedweller. They wouldn’t be wrong.

He’s sweet and gentle, strong and funny, loving and kind, generous and caring, devoted and loyal, romantic and rugged. From the very beginning, he’s treated me like I mean the world to him and I think he knows how much he means to me.

So before I slide any further down this sappy slope, I’ll just say how blessed I am to have spent the past 22 years with Captain Cavedweller.

I love you forever and always, CC!

Your girl

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Happy Birthday! deerToday is a very special day…

It’s Captain Cavedweller’s birthday!

I could go on and on about any number of great things about my guy.

Instead, I think I’ll tell you about something he did recently that just illustrates why I think he’s so incredibly awesome.

As many of you know (and are probably tired of hearing about), my niece got married a few weeks ago.

When I took on the role of wedding planner for her, CC knew that meant he’d be knee-deep in helping, although that is so not his thing. (I mean really, really not his thing.)

Since my niece lives four hours away from us, CC took a rare week of vacation so we could go early and help get everything set up for her big day.

The entire time we were there, CC jumped in wherever he was needed, more often than not before the need was verbalized. He mowed knee-high lawn in 90+degree heat, lugged flowers, helped me tie bows, packed chairs, set up tables, draped organza, strung lights, trimmed trees, tore down a fence, killed a snake, filled a gopher hole, ran errands, wrangled heavy props, filled tubs with ice, moved furniture, and a million other things. While he was doing all that, he also made sure I stayed hydrated (I have a tendency to forget to drink anything when I’m intently focused on a project), rubbed my sore foot, put bandages on my blisters, and offered more support and encouragement than I can fathom.

Whatever we needed, he willingly put his hands and back into it without a word of complaint. He would have rather been doing any number of things than standing on a ladder with me telling him to “hang that bow a little more to the left, no, now the right.”

Amanda with Scott
CC with the beautiful bride. She was  twelve when I started dating him and they’ve always had a sweet relationship.

He helped direct guests at the wedding, visited with the little old ladies at the reception and made me so proud, I could have burst my buttons.

More than one person asked me where I found someone like him. Honestly, I didn’t find him. He is a wonderful blessing and a rare gift that I’m thankful for every single day.

So today, as we celebrate his birthday and eat a piece of walnut-laden carrot cake, my heart overflows with gratitude for my Captain Cavedweller.

Love you, CC, with all my heart – forever and always.

Happy, Happy Birthday to you!

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dollie and russ

 

On this day, 65 years ago, a dimple-cheeked girl with stars in her eyes rushed through her swing shift at the telephone office then raced out to the farm where a handsome boy who had stolen her heart waited to make her his bride.

She didn’t have a fancy, elaborate gown. They both wore gray suits.

Their flowers were gladiolas, pink and white.

And they said “I do” in the minutes before the clock struck midnight due to her working late.

Not the stuff of fairy tales, right?

But today, my parents – that couple who married in a simple ceremony at my grandparents’ farm – celebrate their 65th wedding anniversary.

Sixty-five years.

It kind of boggles the mind, doesn’t it?

And of course, I realized I don’t have a copy of the one and only photo they have from their wedding. You can make sure I’ll be getting one when I see them in a few weeks for my niece’s wedding.

When we had Amanda’s bridal shower a few weeks ago at Mom and Dad’s house, I asked them both to write down their words of wisdom for a happy marriage to share with the bride-to-be.

Mom’s were to never go to bed angry, and to listen to your husband, even when you think he’s wrong.

Dad wrote a hilarious comment that he made me promise Mom would never see, so for his self-preservation, I’ll not pass it on today. (Other than to say he suggested it is good for a husband to listen to a wife, even when she may not be entirely correct.)

My take-away from their advice-sharing was to listen to your partner, to listen from your heart even when you’d rather prove your point or be “right.”

My other take-away was that Dad’s sense of humor and Mom’s willingness to put up with it created a strong foundation for their marriage.

Growing up, I watched some of my classmates go through the trials and tribulations of having their parents divorce. By then, my folks were middle-aged and settled into life, into each other. I never once had to worry about them separating. They were, and are today, a united front.

I don’t think either of them ever once considered leaving each other an option. They were just eighteen and nineteen when they wed, but they made a commitment for a lifetime.

And I’m so glad they did.

If you want to know about true love and real romance, ask a couple who’s been married for more than six decades. I bet they’ll give you some good tips and probably a generous helping of humor.

So, Mom and Dad  – Happy, Happy 65th Anniversary to you!

 

mom and dad

Senior Prom 1949

 

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gratitude challenge

Today’s gratitude challenge is to share my favorite memory.

Wow! I have to pick just one?

The first one that comes to mind is the day I met Captain Cavedweller.

Don’t laugh (at least too loudly), but we met on a blind date arranged by our meddling parents. I was a year out of college, gainfully employed and living in town at the time. He was home for Christmas break from college.

Despite the best efforts of our parents to force us to meet, we foiled their plans. I’m not kidding… my dad and his dad conspired to have me pick up some truck parts at his parents’ house. Aware of the schemers’ plans, he refused to answer the door and I grabbed the parts and got out of there so fast, his mom claims I nearly made her head spin.

The next planned attempt to introduce us was a joint family trip to the woods to get Christmas trees. I found some reason not to go (although it was one of my most favorite things to do) and he refused to go. It ended up no one went that year because everyone got sick.

Fast forward a few weeks. CC’s car wasn’t working right and he couldn’t figure out what was wrong. His dad promised to fix his car but only if he’d go out on a date with me.

Tired of hiding out and creating excuses not to meet, we both gave in and agreed to a date on the day after Christmas.

In the very brief conversation that took place over the phone, CC agreed to pick me up at the house where I was living (which just happened to be less than a mile from his parents’ home) at six so we could eat dinner before going to the movies.

Six o’clock arrived but CC did not.

By 6:30, I was annoyed. At 6:45, I contemplated changing out of the dressy clothes I wore into jeans, turning off the lights and fuming quietly in the dark.

As I headed to the bedroom to change at 6:55, the phone rang. It was him and he’d somehow failed to write down directions to the house (tucked at the end of a curving dead-end street). Even over the phone, he sounded sheepish – and a little frustrated. Apparently, he’d been driving around for more than an hour trying to find my house.

Within five minutes, he rang the bell. I took a deep breath, smoothed down the front of my slacks and opened the door.

He glanced at me with those vibrant blue eyes from the front step and grinned.  In that moment, I knew I’d met the man I would someday marry.

We laugh now, about how persistent our dads were about setting us up. I’m ever so grateful they did. If you ask CC, I think he might just agree.

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gratitude challenge

According to my handy-dandy Gratitude Challenge Chart, this week I’m supposed to blog about gratitude for my spouse.

Gosh, that’s going to be a huge challenge for me… just kidding!

 

Scott April 10 1If you’ve read even a few of my blog posts, you probably get the idea I’m more than a little smitten with my wonderful husband, Captain Cavedweller. After all, I did dedicate a whole year to journaling our dates together.

All kidding aside, I am grateful every single day for the blessing of my husband. He is one of the kindest, gentlest men I know. He’s not only my husband, but also my best friend.

my valentine

I honestly feel like he keeps me balanced and the laughter… the man makes me laugh all the time.

We’ve been married twenty-one years yet he still finds ways to surprise me and make me feel special, cherished, and so loved.

August PhotoHe takes good care of me when I’m sick, lifts me up when I’m down, and cheers me on when we’ve got something to celebrate.

I’ve had a few people make comments that the romances I write are unrealistic because men like the heroes in my books don’t exist. That’s where they are so, so wrong. There are good men like them. I know it for a fact because I’m married to one. CC is a huge inspiration for my characters because I see so much love, goodness, and caring in him.

Don’t get me wrong – I know there are a lot of guys out there who are just the opposite. But there are also a lot of good guys out there, too.

June 2014I’m just so blessed and so very grateful to be married to one of the best.

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grade schoolToday is Captain Cavedweller’s birthday.

Hooray!

There will be cake at our house later today (carrot, of course – his favorite) and maybe a present or two.

engagedBack when I first met this guy 21 years ago, I was so goofy in love with him, I didn’t give more than a random thought to the future. I just knew I wanted it to be with him.

Captain Cavedweller has put up with a lot from me over the years.

A lot.

Back in the days when I was a newspaper reporter, I used to drag him along to all sorts of events and interviews. Once, he ended up being the only male at a fashion show. (I still get reminded of that from time to time!) Thanks to me, he’s been nearly attacked by a cougar, gotten up close and personal with an ostrich, and lost in the hills in the middle of nowhere while attempting to locate a sheepherder. Those were fun times (not so much)!

wheat boy 1More frequently than you’d think, he gets coerced into being part of a prop in a photo. Like standing in a wheat field.

my valentineOr holding a heart (although I think he knows he’s always got mine in his hands).

I guess the point of my rambling is that CC has always been willing to help me, support me, encourage me and love me without hesitation or conditions. He’s got a huge, caring heart and is one of the most honest, upright, kindest people I know. (And I’m not biased in the least).

He’s the kind of person you can count on when the skies are blue, but also when life’s storms hit with full force. In the past year, I’ve been reminded time and again what a blessing he is to me and how blessed I am to have him in my life.

No matter what’s going on in my life, just being with him makes everything better, brighter, and definitely a lot more fun.

July PhotoHappy, Happy Birthday, Captain Cavedweller!

❤ Love you! ❤

 

 

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M&D wedding day

On this very day 64 years ago, my dad anxiously waited at his parent’s house for my mom to finish her evening shift as an operator at the telephone office so they could wed. Although the ceremony was late in the evening, the vows they exchanged held a full measure of promise and love.

Sixty-four years.

Wow!

It’s just such an impressive number, especially in today’s world where people seem more inclined to walk away from a marriage than to invest time, effort, love and commitment into it.

You know I’m all about romance, so I thought I’d share a few photos my mother will no doubt be appalled that I’ve uploaded for all the world to see, but I think you’ll agree they are fun, sweet, and show two people very much in love.

M&D honeymoonThis is of the two crazy kids on their honeymoon. They went camping.

Camping does not list high on my list of honeymoon spots (or any spot for that matter), but they did pick a beautiful location.

 

M&D on shouldersI have no idea what they’re doing here, but I’m entertained by their matching shirts. There is no way in the world CC and I could have ever pulled off this pose – or the matching tops.

 

M&D hugsThere isn’t any specific reason why I love this photo so much, but I do. It’s playful and sweet and fun – all necessary ingredients for a wonderful romance.

 

M&D wth 3 kidsMy dad is a bit of a kidder,  joking around more often than he’s serious, as you can see from the pose above. I think it’s kind of funny he’s the only one looking at the camera.

 

M&D 50thSkipping ahead a bit… this is them at their 50th anniversary celebration at the farm.

I know if you asked them, they would say it wasn’t always easy. Sometimes things got tough – really tough, but they stuck it out and stuck by each other for 64 years.

I may spend my days making up stories of romance and love, but I was fortunate to grow up watching a real love story in our home.

Happy, Happy Anniversary, Mom and Dad!

 

 

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